


Insincerely yours,

by Liliko



Category: Magic Kaito, 名探偵コナン | Detective Conan | Case Closed
Genre: Angst, Dysfunctional Relationships, Effects of Being Conan, Implied Sexual Content, Love/Hate, M/M, No Strings Attached, Pining, Post-Conan Kudou Shinichi, Shinichi trying to get over Ran, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, past!shinran
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-23 07:01:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15600882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liliko/pseuds/Liliko
Summary: Moving on is hard to do, but maybe a certain thief can help him forget.Or: Shinichi moves into a new apartment, and Kaitou Kid can't seem to stay away.





	Insincerely yours,

 

Shinichi arrived home that evening to find the lock on his door thoroughly picked. He spent a moment inspecting the doorknob. It was a cold day, and the imprints of a hand lay revealed of all to see, warm where the rest of the surface was misted over. This was either the most incompetent criminal in the world, or one who wanted to be caught. 

Just as he was thinking that, the faint sound of music drifted in through the open door. He approached the sound with a reasonable amount of caution, hand hovering over the holster of his gun.

 “You’re back early.”

Looking up from the side of his couch, was the internationally wanted thief, Kaitou KID. He was draped, languid on the arms, long legs outstretched, face twisted into a wolfish grin. The TV was on behind him — some cutesy teenage idol girl group. Neon flashing lights of the screen illuminating his features in the semi-darkness. He seemed so perfectly at home that any observer would think he was. Then again, he always looked and moved with a sense of ownership and entitlement, no matter how little claim he had to anything. Shinichi supposed that was a given with his profession.

Eyes widened as he seemed to notice the gun still held in Shinichi’s hand. A split-second look of panic that anyone but the Detective would’ve missed.

“Watch where you’re pointing that thing,” he hissed, clearly disgruntled. “Sheesh. Gonna give me a heart attack. What happened to all those cute little gadgets you used to use?”

Shinichi’s eyes narrowed. 

“Conan used those. Not me.” 

“Whatever,” KID shrugged and Shinichi heard the rustling of a bag of chips from below his line of sight. “Doesn’t give you the right to point a gun at me.” He stuffed a handful into his mouth, but his sharp eyes were still trained, unmoving, on the gun.

Shinichi sighed, putting it back in it’s holster. KID visibly relaxed when he felt he wasn’t under threat any longer.

“I thought you were a thief,” Shinichi explained.

KID raised an eyebrow.

“You know what I mean,” Shinichi snapped, feeling distinctly annoyed. It had been a long day, and he was too tired for this. 

The crunch of his chips and the electronic beats and auto-tuned vocals of the idol group permeated the otherwise silent room.

“I’m not going to rob your place, if that’s what you’re thinking,” he said after a while. “I’m not that low-class.”

Shinichi scoffed.

“I know. You prefer to perform your thefts in front of as large an audience as possible.”

KID’s mouth stretched into a wide grin and he clapped his hands in sarcastic celebration. “Ding, ding, ding. Wow, you got it. You must be like, a detective or something.” 

“Why are you here, Kid?” Shinichi asked, low and humourless. Not giving the thief the satisfaction of responding to his taunt. He was starting to loose his patience. 

KID smirked in that way that he knew pissed Shinichi off, all teeth, canines bared. An expression that radiated arrogance from the centre of his being. 

“Why do I always come here?” 

There was something dangerous in his tone. In a second, his legs swung up from the couch, and he was on his feet. Before Shinichi knew it, he was standing right in front of him.

“To hide from the police?” the Detective offered, voice deadpan. 

“To see you,” KID replied, and there was a gleam in his eyes.

 

 

-

 

 

Shinichi wasn’t completely sure how it began. 

Only that loosing Ran was like becoming Conan all over again. Like having everything, and then suddenly, nothing at all.

And that his encounters with the men in black had left him paranoid and skittish. He jumped at loud noises sometimes, and found it difficult to trust strangers. Felt uncomfortable under the spotlight he had once loved.

Gradually, he began to withdraw more and more into himself. Like any spoiled rich kid, his parents had bought him an apartment to celebrate his coming of age. And so he left Beika behind. Escaped with a new address, away from everything and everyone that reminded him of the past.

Daytime was always a blur. A cup of coffee every morning. Black, no sugar. Hauling himself out of bed. Police sirens seemed to follow him everywhere he went. Like the Furies, vengeful and relentless, in pursuit of their next victim.

But the night, the night was a relief. Because that was when KID would appear.

He’d never admit it, but heists were always fun for him. Their battle of wits gave him a chance to test his mental strength in a way that didn’t end in murder. 

KID had always liked to push his boundaries. But somewhere along the way, it had turned into something more. 

Somewhere on a deserted rooftop, the shrill of police sirens resounding below them, and the full moon bright in the sky. Just when he thought he’d finally caught the fabled phantom thief, and his thoughts lingered between triumph and regret. Pressed up against a concrete wall, with no escape in site, KID had kissed him. 

Shinichi knew it was just another one of his tactics. To throw him off guard, allowing the thief to make a run for it. He knew all this, but against all that was rational in the world, he kissed back.

He’d needed a new distraction.

 

 

-

 

 

“I ought to arrest you for breaking and entering,” Shinichi muttered into KID’s collar. KID’s fingers were threaded through his hair, surprising light, and he could feel the ghost of laughter through his hands on the thief’s chest.

“We both know you don’t have the guts,” KID replied with a smirk, hand reaching up under his shirt, cool against his skin, tickling his ribs. 

“Really, now?”

“Because you need me,” KID said, voice low, and kissed him long and hard. They broke apart with his breath still on Shinichi’s cheek. “You need me.”

“You think too highly of yourself,” the Detective sneered, though he was flushed and out of breath. 

“It’s only the truth. Without people like me, what is your value in this world?” His voice was dark and breathy, lips kissing down Shinichi’s neck, his collarbone, his chest. “A criminal can exist freely without a Detective. But a Detective needs a criminal to exist.” He felt himself being pushed down, suddenly. Felt KID straddle him, catch his wrists in his hands and hold them down. Like there wasn’t any escape. He smiled. That arrogant smile Shinchi had always hated, ever since they first met. “Without crime, what are you?”

What indeed. 

If he hadn’t chosen this job, this _life_ , maybe Ran would still be with him. Conan wouldn’t have existed, that was for sure. No evil organisations. No death. No nightmares. No one he failed to save. Maybe he would’ve been with her now, coming out of an Izakaya holding hands; a perfect campus couple. Cheering her on in her Karate tournaments, because he’d actually have time for her. Spending the weekend curled up on the sofa, bundled in blankets, watching cheesy romances. 

The thief hadn’t mentioned the other way Shinichi needed him. Maybe that was for the better. Because little parts of KID seemed familiar sometimes. Sometimes he would speak using her voice to throw Shinichi off guard. Sometimes the way his hair stuck up reminded him of her. Once he disguised himself as a woman wearing an off-shoulder red dress, just like the one she wore all those years ago. Sometimes, under the light of neon sirens, his eyes would glint violet, just like hers.

 

 

-

 

 

But maybe it wasn’t enough. Shinichi still thought he saw Ran around every street corner. In the puddles after the rain, reflected in shop windows, in rearview mirrors.

But he didn’t dare go near her. He’d heard Sonoko, loud and catty, “I told you so. He was no good for you. He’s probably off with some other woman now. Don’t waste time thinking about him anymore.” 

In Spring he came across her at a park where you could see the cherry blossoms bloom. She was with Sonoko, and several other people he didn’t know. How strange that she should have other friends, he thought. In the past they were so close they had almost been like one person, and everyone who knew Ran knew Shinichi too. 

They were all drinking, clinking bottles lined up on a pink picnic blanket, raucous with laughter and music from someone’s speakers. Ran was smiling, all teeth and eyes like crescent moons. Smiling as the man beside her reached to tuck a flower into her hair. She reached up to adjust it, bracelets on slender wrists jingling in the breeze, the stranger’s hand lingering for just a second too long.

 

 

-

 

 

“Nothing good will come of longing,” KID told him nonchalantly, leaning on the kitchen counter, halfway through a slice of chocolate cake. One that he had helped himself to without permission, Shinichi might add. Then again, it was foolish to allow a thief into your home and expect him not to steal anything.

“What are you talking about?” The Detective mumbled, distracted. He was reading through case files — case files he probably shouldn’t have been looking at with a wanted criminal in the same room — but he had caught himself thinking about what it would’ve been like to brush Ran’s hair to the side, feel the warmth of her cheeks when she blushed, see the flutter of her shyly downcast eyes and the twitch of a secret smile on her lips. 

“You have to go out and get it, there’s no point in just sitting around regretting what your life could’ve been.” 

Shinichi’s head whipped around so fast he hurt his neck. “I wasn’t following her, I swear!” he  began to say rather quickly, barely noticing the way his papers had fallen out of his hands and scattered across the table, “I was just passing by, and she happened to be in the area, I just wanted to make sure she was okay, I didn’t hang around —”

KID’s laughter abruptly cut off his sentence. Shinichi suddenly felt his face flush in violent embarrassment.

“I don’t blame you for still being hung up on your girl,” he said, that all-knowing smirk plastered on his face, “She was always a real cutie. Totally my type, too.”

Shinichi felt something break inside him. “Don’t talk about her like that.”

“Tch. Always so touchy,” KID muttered, focus returning to his cake. He finished it and licked his fingers, long and lingering. Then his eyes were on Shinichi, sated and smug like a cat who’d caught a canary. “Lighten up, Meitantei, learn how to take a joke.”

Shinichi let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding, and it came out taught and shallow. His hand held the counter for support, gripping it so tightly he felt as though his fingers would break.

 

 

-

 

 

It was strange, Shinichi thought, that you could have seen every inch of a person’s body and barely know anything about them. Or visa versa. 

To touch Ran was something akin to Eve and the apple. She was, and forever would be, out of reach. Pure, almost sacred. Someone Shinichi could never deserve enough. When their fingers had so much as brushed, he’d felt the longing and frightened hope of a hundred guilty dreams well inside him. 

KID, on the other hand, was very easy to touch. Perhaps he made himself so. He was open and shameless, even when Shinichi could be cold and stand-offish. And he was always touching Shinichi. Sometimes it was subtle —a light hand on his upper thigh was enough, and fingers that would maybe _clench_ slightly every so often. Other times, that same hand would very quietly just _slip_ inside his jeans.

(But when he closed his eyes, all he could see was _her_.)

 

 

-

 

 

“That other Detective keeps trying to call you, Detective.”

He hadn't noticed KID pickpocketing his phone. Then again, of course he hadn’t, he thought with mild annoyance. No matter what, that thief could still find ways to catch him off guard.

Sure enough, the screen displayed the Osakan Detective’s name.

“Let it ring off,” Shinichi said, “I don’t really feel like talking to Hattori right now,”

“And yet you’ll talk to me?” KID laughed. “You’re a strange one.”

Maybe he was strange. To be spending so much voluntary time with a wanted criminal. But he definitely didn’t want to talk to Heiji. Because Heiji would inevitably ask what was wrong with him. Why he wasn’t returning his texts, why he hadn’t been to Osaka to see him even though he was constantly being invited. Why he looked tired and despondent all the time, even when doing the things that used to fill him with so much energy, like solving mysteries. 

Why he broke up with Ran, when they were so perfect together.

Heiji would worry about him. And he would act on his worry. Intrude into his life like an enthusiastic but ultimately unwanted Evangelist door-knocker. Trying to put him back together again, bring the fire back into his eyes. 

And he would, inevitably, fail. He’d beat himself up about it, berating himself for not being a better friend. Blame himself for not being able to lift Shinichi out of his slump. Shinichi didn’t want Heiji to be upset over him. It was a burden he simply didn’t want his friend to carry.

KID, on the other hand, frankly, did not give a damn. About Shinichi's life, his problems, or anything, really. That was what was so refreshing about him. The complete lack of friendship and trust was what made their relationship so convenient.

He knew KID was a bad influence. He was an unrepentant career criminal. Lying, cheating and manipulating were things he did on an almost daily basis. You could never tell quite where you stood with him. One moment he was friendly and cheerful, sharp-tongued and cruel the next. And Shinichi didn’t trust him, not one bit. He was sure KID had some ulterior motive for continuing to engage in this loveless and illicit affair with him. Maybe he was using his time with Shinichi to secretly procure intel that would help him on his next heist. Maybe this was all just a sick joke.

Sometimes he would think about asking him to leave. But then KID could make him come undone with his mouth or his hands, and more, importantly, he filled the lonely hours and the silence with sound. He could make Shinichi forget about _her_ for an hour or two, and that was enough. So he couldn’t get away.

(And he was always gone by morning.)

 

  

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I noticed a lot of fics have this idea of Kaito and Shinichi finding solace/comfort in each other because they’ve been through similar things (eg lying to their love interests). So I wanted to kinda subvert that. instead of actually having a healthy relationship, they have a really messed-up, dysfunctional no strings attached deal going on. The idea of using each other in order to forget… yeah… 
> 
> But maybe it’ll get better??? And also I’ll explain why Ran and Shinichi broke up for real. That’s if I ever find the courage to continue this because I’m honestly so embarrassed omggggg I want to delete thissss
> 
> please leave comment to let me know what you think & if you want me to continue TT_TT idk i might want to just leave this as a oneshot;;;;


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